Den of Irrelevant Sinnery

Razor Gator!

2006-03-09T06:25:01Z

http://razor-gator.com

Seriously, if this isn't the best thing in the world, I don't know what is. I've had to deal with razor gunk for a long time now, and I'm more than ready to kiss it goodbye (not that I want to kiss razor gunk, it's gross).

Protect our precious metal reserves! Buy Razor Gator!

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

2005-05-21T06:00:56Z

It's only been two days since I saw Revenge of the Sith and I'm already beginning to find reasons to loathe it.

Watching the original trilogy the next day didn't help. It's just fucking ace.

I still maintain that it was good, but it is falling further and further from the greatness of the originals.

Patented Guilt & Grief Spray

2005-05-17T16:26:10Z

You know, it's kinda weird that I've suddenly given up on the career path I've been sure of for the last 10 years.

I guess it really hasn't sunk in yet.

Math is Pain

2005-05-16T16:51:51Z

I don't know whether to love or hate my Calc teacher. He announced at the beginning of the semester that your final grade would be dependent on what you actually got out of the class, not just how many points you got. Therefore, even if you failed every test in the entire semester, you would get a B for your grade if you pulled an 80 on your final. I can see the logic of that since the final is cumulative, but it's probably going to completely destroy me in the end. I haven't lifted a finger this entire semester, so my entire grade is dependent on this one test coming up in 40 minutes.

oy

I don't see what's so important about Bases Ball

2005-05-15T19:26:21Z

Had an interesting day yesterday.

First of all, I went to my friend's house to watch the original Bad News Bears for my first time. Since the remake is coming around eventually, I was curious. I enjoyed the movie, but didn't really see the need for a remake. I mean, it didn't seem extremely outdated for a 30 year old movie, and that's pretty impressive. I guess some things never change.

Then we left for a real baseball game. The Nationals are our new home team, so we felt obliged to actually go to a game this season. We left pretty early, and found our seats about a half hour before the game was scheduled to start. Unfortunately, the game was then postponed for two hours and forty minutes due to severe rain and thunderstorms. It wasn't entirely terrible waiting all that time, the storm was fun to watch from our seats and we kept relatively dry from the roof over our seats. During calm moments of the storm, a few fans lost their patience and ran onto the field. No good security tackles, but one guy used the rain tarp as a slip-n'-slide (and he got away, too). Finally, a small event noted by ESPN.com:

"During the torrential downpour, gusty wind blew the large metal tube on which the tarp is rolled from the warning track in left-center into short right-center, a distance of about 200 feet, with the crowd cheering its progress."

Yeah, we were pretty starved for entertainment. T-shirt cannons won't hold us for 160 minutes.

The game amazingly eventually started, and the Nats won around 12:30AM (after being at the stadium for 6 hours). We decided the night shouldn't be over yet, so we went to an all-night diner to celebrate. Note that before we got there, I said we should probably go to a Denny's or IHOP instead because diners were "too ghetto". As soon as we walked in, some hick there called my friend's brother a "redneck" and called us all troublemakers before he left. We probably shouldn't pay much attention to a guy who had a piece of paper that said "Jack Mehoff" on his chest like a makeshift nametag.

However, it only got better. An argument between the cook and a customer broke out over a chair that shouldn't be moved. Yeah, it was just that. The customer noted that he wouldn't leave a tip, and the waitress noted that they wouldn't make his food. The argument wasn't that bad until the customers (two of them now) said they were going to leave, and the cook said that no, they HAD to leave. This was the wrong thing to say, as another argument broke out that I was half-sure was going to break into a fistfight. Fortunately or unfortunately it didn't, but it took 15 minutes to resolve before we could actually order some food. The food was okay (but included the worst chocolate milk I've EVER had. More Ovaltine please!), but it was mostly worth it for the entertainment value.

No one will ever doubt my judgement of ghetto-ness again, and that's the moral of the story.

Now to study for the Calc exam that basically amounts to 100% of my grade tomorrow.

Chocolate of Sorrow

2005-05-14T16:09:11Z

I just hit up four different Wendy's last night for free Frosties as part of their free Frosty weekend. I don't think I've ever vomited this much.

Video Games - Serious Business

2005-05-12T19:16:12Z

Presented in this order because I'm too lazy to reverse the list and make it interesting.

1. Super Mario World 2: Yoshi's Island
2. Super Metroid
3. Super Mario 64
4. Castlevania: Aria of Sorrow
5. Super Mario RPG
6. Final Fantasy VI
7. Kirby Superstar
8. Tetris (GB)
9. Robotrek
10. Half-Life
11. Contra
12. E.V.O. The Search for Eden
13. Grand Theft Auto III
14. Sim City 2000
15. Deus Ex
16. Bubble Bobble
17. Wario Ware Inc: Mega Microgame$
18. River City Ransom
19. Super Mario Bros. 3
20. The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past
21. Civilization 2
22. Super Smash Bros.
23. Super Mario Land 3: Wario Land
24. Kirby's Dream Land 2
25. M.U.L.E. (NES)
26. Half-Life 2
27. Donkey Kong (GB)
28. Super Mario Kart
29. Mega Man 2
30. Final Fantasy IV
31. Metroid: Zero Mission
32. Anachronox
33. The Legend of Zelda: Link's Awakening
34. Earthbound
35. Grand Theft Auto: Vice City
36. Gunstar Heroes
37. Final Fantasy VII
38. Starcraft
39. Final Fantasy Adventure
40. Secret of Mana
41. Pokemon Red/Blue
42. Jumping Flash!
43. Katamari Damacy
44. Advance Wars
45. Comix Zone
46. Sonic the Hedgehog 2
47. Worms 2
48. The Secret of Monkey Island
49. Phantasy Star IV
50. Quake II
51. Goldeneye 007
52. Twisted Metal
53. Actraiser
54. Chrono Trigger
55. Diablo II
56. Time Crisis 2
57. Mega Man X
58. Max Payne
59. Rise of Nations
60. Mike Tyson's Punch-Out!!
61. Doom
62. Ms. Pac-Man
63. Suikoden
64. Startropics
65. Snake Rattle & Roll
66. City of Heroes
67. The Legend of Zelda: The Minish Cap
68. Rock & Roll Racing
69. Super Mario Bros.
70. Contra III: The Alien Wars
71. Shining Force II
72. Call of Duty
73. Super Bomberman 2
74. Strider (Arcade)
75. Harvest Moon
76. Soldat
77. Super Mario World
78. Crazy Taxi
79. Toejam & Earl
80. Dragon Warrior IV
81. Halo
82. Sonic Spinball
83. Lufia II: Rise of the Sinistrals
84. Final Fantasy Tactics Advance
85. Unreal Tournament 2004
86. Dungeons & Dragons: Tower of Doom
87. Tecmo Super Bowl
88. Super Mario Bros. 2
89. The Sims
90. Super Dodgeball
91. Soulblazer
92. Dance Dance Revolution
93. Toejam & Earl 2: Panic on Funkatron
94. Oregon Trail (Mac)
95. Puzzle Pirates
96. Ninja Gaiden
97. Mega Man Battle Network 2
98. Smash TV
99. Super Punch-Out!!
100. Alien Vs. Predator (Arcade)

If you don't find your favorite game here, it's either because:
1. I haven't played it.
2. I haven't played it enough to form a definite opinion of it.
3. It was too similar to another game on the list.
4. I didn't think it was that great. Sorry.

Six more days before I go home for the summer. I don't know whether to be happy or scared shitless. Probably the latter.

Everydaze

2005-05-05T21:46:28Z

There's only 8 days left of school and I can't do shit. Why do I suck so much?

I Left My Towel On Betelgeuse (Part II)

2005-05-01T06:29:32Z

I was pleased, not just because this was a good adaptation of the HHGttG book, but a good movie. Yes, you don't have to be a Douglas Adams nerd to enjoy this movie. In fact, it might help if you're not. I believe this movie reflects what you expect it to be. If you expect to be disappointed, you might very well be. After all, this is trying to live up to a classic book, while not copying it word for word. I have two words for you all:

Don't Panic.

Don't look for a reason to be disappointed, and you won't be. Sure, some types won't get the humor, just don't take them with you (a mistake I made). Fortunately, the opening dolphin song-and-dance number is a good litmus test to whether you can stand the rest of the movie.

Martin Freeman does an excellent job as you, the player... I mean, Arthur Dent. You never second guess how lost and confused he is as the characters around him steal the scene. I would go on about how great the acting is, but I can't pick out great acting as much as I can pick out bad acting. And although the dialogue gets cheesy at points, no one loses character, and that's all that needs to be said.

Adams' humor comes across great at points, but is sometimes played too fast to get a good reaction from the crowd. While even a mildly book-savvy fan can pick out their favorite lines, casual viewers might miss them entirely. I think everyone would benefit from seeing the movie again, possibly on DVD (which I anticipate greatly). The movie's slapstick and sight gags complement the rest of the humor nicely, instead of feeling tacked on or childish.

Even with my nitpick radar turned off, I still found a couple of scenes sorely missing from the movie. Fortunately, these will probably be included in the DVD, but that doesn't entirely make up for their absence. The movie doesn't quite build up right, either. It doesn't detract from the humor, but instead gives a vague sense that the movie is dragging on and oops, it's over now.

Now to the spoiling parts.

The two most major complaints I've heard about the movie are the romance between Trillian and Arthur, and the happy "everything is back to normal" ending. I'm not extremely troubled by either, I'm more interested in what directions the sequels will take. Seeing that the original novel hasn't been butchered, I'm more willing to see the sequels go off in their own directions while keeping the nods to the novels. It will be risky, yes, but this cast is more likely than any to pull it off.

On my arbitrary rating scale, I give it an 8 out of 10. Analyzing this movie would be an insult to Adams himself.

And something related to leave you with.

Froody

2005-05-01T01:43:13Z

Go see The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. Unless, of course, you are retarded and hate fun.

Selling Out to Hypocrisy

2005-04-27T18:05:12Z

I finally acquired a job as a professional hippie. While it doesn't seem like something I should be paid to do, I won't argue it. It gives me something to do over the summer and maybe I'll make some decent scratch for once in my life.

Really, that's the only interesting thing that's happened to me over the past few weeks. Well, other than relapsing into my usual bout of laziness and gluttony, but that's to be expected by now.

They keep on RISIIIIIIING!

They Keep on Rising

2005-04-20T00:36:40Z

It is confirmed. Being sick blows. This could hardly be a less opportune time for it, too. I think I'm just going to curl up and die now.

Also: All hail Darth Pope.

Bring Out Your Dead

2005-04-17T16:04:55Z

Well, I didn't get sick yesterday, but I still feel like crap today. I'd almost rather be bedridden for one day than have to feel general crappiness for the next week while I have to do work.

If things weren't bad enough, I didn't get the first job I interviewed for. I have another I haven't heard back from yet, but I should really get more applications in before I end up jobless for another year.

On a lighter note...

It's DooM. It's Rogue. Go figure.

Bury Me With My Money

2005-04-16T04:26:40Z

I'm showing symptoms of a sickness that hit me like a ton of bricks a few days ago. I really hope I don't get sick, since this weekend is supposed to be my little vacation away from school.

I was really looking forward to being home, but now it seems pretty craptacular. Oh well, maybe next week will be better.

I left my towel on Betelgeuse

2005-04-14T03:53:49Z

I'd hardly call myself a hardcore Douglas Adams fan (though I was pretty bummed when he died). I've read the Trilogy a few times (except for Mostly Harmless which starts out boring as hell). So needless to say, I thoroughly enjoyed the novels and was heavily looking forward to the movie to be released in about two weeks.

Then I had the misforturne to read this review. I've gotten over the initial shock and have convinced myself that this might just be the ravings of an embittered fan who can't enjoy a movie. Nonetheless, I'm torn over whether to look forward to this anymore. I wasn't ready to be disappointed, but I should prepare myself now lest I end up strangling myself with the towel I bring to the theater. At least I haven't read the books in over a year, so I won't be able to point out the omissions as easily. I'll try not to be tied down to the words on the page, and just enjoy the movie for the movie.

Likewise, I've had six years to come to terms that Episode III will probably suck, and I'm still going to see that. Hey, everybody needs closure.

Like this entry.

The Jihad is coming...

2005-04-13T04:29:17Z

My Unitarian Jihad Name is: Sister Neutron Bomb of Enlightened Compassion.

Get yours.

So we all have to participate in memes now and again. So what? You wanna fight about it?

The World Revolves Around Me (probably)

2005-04-12T04:24:16Z

My life would be a lot more interesting if I were female. Well, it wouldn't be, but a lot more people would suddenly care. And that would be cool.

Still no word on my employment. They said to wait two weeks, so I continue to hang on a thread of hope. Chances are I won't get the job since only team-playing happy people are allowed to get shitty jobs... I should stop before I contract Angstmata. Fucking conformists.

...ow, my wrists are bleeding. Fuck.

Let me get some paper towels.

Vanity for the Faint of Heart

2005-04-09T18:54:04Z

I made some minor cosmetic changes, which is pointless since no one will view this outside of thier friends page. It's worth sacrificing comfort in order to show how many faces I have rocked. And in the end, isn't that what's really important?

I'll probably spend the rest of the day tweaking things unsuccessfully to try to emulate my old layout.

Instructions to the Internet (and other lost works)

2005-04-09T04:18:32Z

Five minutes will mark the one month anniversary of my first entry in this LiveJournal. I knew I was going to do something special for this occasion, but I can't think of anything at the moment. So instead I will just ramble on for slightly longer than average... in reminiscence!

I think my early aversion to blogs was the word itself. Blog. Sounds like something a bear leaves in the woods, or maybe a soggy, moss covered piece of wood. Nevertheless, I thought it was completely retarded. I didn't think to read other people's blogs unless they had a theme: politics, video games, whatever. The last thing I wanted to read about was the trials and tribulations of adolescent losers. I had my own adolescent loser self to keep track of, and that was hard enough.

Secondly was the problem of my life being uninteresting. As you can plainly see, nothing about that has changed, I just got over it and pretended to be meaningful anyway. I guess it's a blessing in disguise, since it forces me to substitute wit in place of interesting stories. Except when I don't, then it's boring all around. My sense of self-degradation can never be substituted, however.

I started writing as a joke, unsure of whether I would ever write again. I can't say I've become addicted to this kind of rambling, but it didn't turn me off like I assumed it would. It's a somewhat happy medium that I wouldn't mind keeping up for a while longer. I still maintain that my primary reason for doing this is to sharpen my writing skills in case I ever get off my lazy ass and write something worthwhile. I was a great writer when I was a kid, but my skills haven't increased proportionally with my age. Rusty writing skills would be my secret shame.

So I will continue to post. Maybe one day I'll... all right, I can't possibly think of anything that I could do. I'll work on that, too.

But until then...

Current Mood: Incandescent
Current Music: Tom Petty - The Waiting

Anyway, to the Internet!

It's Springtime For Hitler

2005-04-06T18:16:34Z

I had my first job interview on Monday. It went all right, but I really suck at relating my life experiences on the spot. I don't have a great memory to begin with, and I tend to avoid working with groups, so it's quite possible these events never occurred. That doesn't mean I can't slave away eight hours a day pretending I like to be a team player. It was just as saccharine and artificial as I thought it would be, but I guess it prepares me for dishonesty in other fields such as crime or politics.

On a lighter note, the weather here is absolutely beautiful. Which is nature's way of telling us that it will just get cold and rainy again, then blisteringly hot. I guess that wasn't a lighter note at all, but it'll be nice to enjoy it while it lasts.

Crushing Banality is my Favorite Fatality

2005-04-05T04:18:47Z

Technology Cannot Hold Me Back

2005-04-03T05:50:13Z

I've always wondered what would happen if I started a LJ post with nothing in mind to write. Then I realized that's how all my entries start.

I got a job interview lined up at the local Target. If I get hired, you may look forward to tons of future "omg customers are STOOPID" entries. If I don't, you'll be looking forward to a lot more entries like this one. I know which I would prefer, even without the added monetary bonus.

I'm kind of twitchy right now, which I suppose is better than being hungry and tired like I was a few minutes ago. My dorm room is starting to feel claustrophobic. It's squeezing out my stream of consciousness like a bad case of diarreah. Hey, suddenly I'm not hungry anymore!

I would like to publicly mourn for the loss of one of the most influential men of the 20th century. Frank Perdue, we will miss you.

This is usually the place where I link to a funny or interesting website. Well, I ran out. Shoo.

Whoops, I Forgot a Subject

2005-04-01T21:21:22Z

T-shirt update: I was only 31 minutes early from the exact time. This wasn't enough to win anything, but I still got an honorable mention. Now let's never speak of it again.

Coming soon: A one month retrospective of beginning my first Livejournal. Or to sum it up, this.

If anyone wants to be pranked for April Fool's day, uhhh... here, kittens.

God created the PSP to find the Last Starfighter

2005-03-31T23:51:33Z

R.I.P. Mitch Hedberg. Of all the people who died or might die today, you were the only one who intentionally made me laugh.

'Tis better to have Internet Loved and Internet Lost than never to have Internet Loved at all.

2005-03-30T21:20:47Z

Internet drama is as exciting as it is dangerous and sexy. I used to have the mindset that it was a complete waste of time to be ignored, but now I realize that it's a cheap and easy source of entertainment that gives a different experience every time. Plus it's on the internet, so nothing is hurt except feelings.

Sometimes I feel like a dick about being so snarky in response to someone's genuine pain or anguish. That feeling usually subsides when I realize the chances of people finding my home address on the internet and coming over to stab me in the neck are very unlikely. Still, people need to get over themselves sometimes, and I'd like to think I'm helping by making light of their personal crises.

Plus I'm fairly confident in my mockery since I believe I'll never be dragged into it myself. It's probably a combination of being too much of a loser to be a magnet for such drama, and being smart enough to avoid it when I see it coming. Probably more the former than the latter. Much more. Such is life.

(Intermission)

Whoa

Horrible site of the day. I think it fits well with today's "making light of other people's real tragedies" theme. I'm not gonna throw any of my money into the discussion, since it's been done to death. I just hope I win a free t-shirt out of it.

I'm not sure if I'm a liar or just stricken with vanity, but I would actually prefer it if a couple people actually read this. I mean, what are LiveJournals for if you can't use it to masturbate your ego? What the hell is personal gratification?